Barry E. Gaines Author of “The Genitalia Scrolls”!

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Click Here to Purchase the eBook on Amazon Kindle.
Audiobook also available on Amazon, and iTunes.

“The Genitalia Scrolls”

A humorous cosmic take on our sexuality as seen through the eyes of an extraterrestrial as told by the writer who made contact.

Do any of you remember that Halloween when aliens from another world demonstrated their abilities, which affected our sex lives? They believe we’ve taken our genitalia for granted and have committed Gooc (genitalia out of control) on Earth. They’re concerned we will eventually overpopulate our planet and seek new worlds to Gooc, including their own. To this the aliens have chosen messengers around the world to spread their words.

This is the story and mission of one of the chosen.

Valdek an extraterrestrial from the planet Vi-Kal-Der, makes contact with Evan Wallace Simon, a single out-of-work writer, as liaison. Simon goes through a gauntlet of trials as he delivers their message to friends, a love interest, the media and government agencies.

The aliens present us with their Genitalia Scrolls as a guideline to stop GOOC (genitalia out of control) with the hope we will join UGAP (the United Galactic Alliance of Planets) for better intergeni-galactic relations.

“The Genitalia Scrolls”



Creatively powered silliness with cautionary undertones.
Aliens bring bad news for sexy earthlings in this otherworldly, 

tongue-in-cheek romp. 

Gaines incorporates plenty of exposition into his sexually charged
satire ….

while a good portion of the details amount to orbiting a cosmos of
goofy acronyms, those are the key ingredients that make this debut

…. easy entertainment for readers who like their erotic,
extraterrestrial science fiction on the light and fluffy side.

Kirkus Reviews


An ingenious futuristic romp full of social commentary on
sexual mores….Gaines has a wonderfully accessible and ironic voice.
Fans of Douglas Adams will enjoy this gonzo novel.

Paul Dinas, Editor


From Readers

5.0 out of 5 stars 5-Stars-12
A very enjoyable journey, didn’t expect the ending, kept me guessing
all the way through. A definite must read for the sci-fi fan.

5.0 out of 5 stars 5-Stars-12
By Earl S. Pollack (Port Charlotte, FL.) – (REAL NAME)

Who would have thought not having sex could be so much fun? This
read was different, original, and thoroughly enjoyable. I hope the
author continues to write and I will continue to buy.

5.0 out of 5 stars 5-Stars-12

Funny stuff. Enjoyed reading the book; Original concept with
overtones of the serious problems facing mankind today. Hope there’s
a movie coming soon!

5.0 out of 5 stars 5-Stars-12
Calissa Klosty “Caline” (Los Angeles,Ca. USA)

Having seen the very funny video promoting this book, i decided to read
Mr. Gaines’ romp into the world of sci-fi sexuality. And what a
romp it was!
Fast moving and continuously amusing, it is a guilty pleasure.


Early Audible audiobook review

5-Stars-12…a WILD ride!
What other book might you compare The Genitalia Scrolls:
The Bottom Line from Upper Space to and why?
The bible, in modern times… kind of. Imagine being stuck with an
alien message that you must teach to all human kind … how would
you do it? How would you be accepted? What would stop you
from this?

Jeremy Shinjuku-Ku, Japan